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Poems & HumorFOOD HUMOR >  Thoughts for a Crisis

 

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THOUGHTS TO GET YOU THROUGH ANY CRISIS
 

  • Indecision is the key to flexibility.
  • There is always one more son-of-a-b---- than you counted on.
  • There is absolutely NO substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
  • Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
  • Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
  • Sometimes too much to drink is not enough.
  • The facts, although they may be interesting, are irrelevant.
  • The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
  • Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
  • Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.
  • Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
  • Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
  • Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
  • I have seen the truth and it makes no sense
  • Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism.
  • This is probably as bad as it can get, but don’t count on it.
  • If you think that there’s good in everyone, you haven’t met everyone.
  • All other things equal, fat people use more soap.
  • If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
  • One seventh of your life is spent on Mondays
  • By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
  • Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that live is serious.
  • The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

 

 

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