Jeff Smith, the Frugal Gourmet, When asked about his carving skills, replied:
"I just yell at the bird and hope the meat will fall off."
“....the uncouth operations of bad carvers occasion almost as much discomfort to those who witness, as they do generally of awkwardness and embarrassment to those who exhibit them.”
‘Modern Cookery for Private Families’ (1845)
“The capon is a cockerel made as it were female by carving away of his gendering stones.”
Bartholomeus, John de Trevisa's translation of
‘De Proprietatibus Rerum’ (1398)
“Let's carve him as a dish fit for the gods,
Not hew him as a carcass fit for hounds.”
William Shakespeare (1564-1616) 'Julius Caesar'
“You ought to have seen Frédéric with his monocle, his greying whiskers, his calm demeanour, carving his plump quack-quack, trussed and already flamed, throwing it into the pan, preparing the sauce, salting and peppering like Claude Monet's paintings, with the seriousness of a judge and the precision of a mathematician, and opening up, with a sure hand, in advance, every perspective of taste.”
Leon Daudet describing Frederic of La Tour d'Argent preparing a pressed duck
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